In the early life of a man, he is taught how to hustle, earn, and provide. Society rewards ambition, celebrates success, and constantly reminds men of the importance of becoming financially capable. Yet one of the most overlooked aspects of personal finance for men is learning how to spend wisely.
Most financial problems are not caused by how much you earn. They are caused when your spending does not match the amount of money that you make.
The problem of overspending is worsened when dating comes into the picture.
In my observation, men don’t have a problem of living within their means when they are alone.
Financial issues often begin when they meet a woman they are desperate to impress.
At such a time, you start stretching your budget, you start skipping your savings, you start contemplating taking debt and you find yourself justifying very expensive decisions.
The goal is understandable. We always want to make a good impression which is okay. It only becomes a problem when you start creating a kind of lifestyle that is not sustainable.
Also read: The Only Thing That You Need To Get Out Of Poverty
As you squander your future because of a very beautiful woman, it’s wise to ask yourself, can you find such beauty within your budget.
It feels good to date a high maintenance woman, but that is just in theory because if a middle-class man was given the Kardashians today, they will end up in debt trying to maintain their lifestyle.
Lets have a man to man talk. You see, it’s okay to lie to other people, what's not okay is when you lie to yourself.
If what you are truly chasing is beauty, beauty exists at every income level, even in the village. So when it comes to dating, always go for the person your income can support.
Living within your means is not as hard as we always make it.
I’ll tell you why,
Truth is, the richest man in the world can be known. The poorest man cannot.
There is always someone richer than you and there is always someone poorer than you.
So, wherever the lifestyle you choose, that lifestyle is always better than someone else’s or below someone else.
Taking a loan to impress a woman is dumb. Withdrawing from your savings to impress a woman is dumb. Taking from your retirement plan to impress a woman is dumb.
Do you know what's not dumb? Paying yourself first, creating a side hustle that generates passive income, setting it aside and categorizing it under entertainment.
Withdrawing from this kind of sinking fund is what men with goals of attaining financial freedom do.
In an article written by Boluwatife Akindele on PiggyVest, a man borrowed ₦2.5 million to date and impress a woman.
According to him, the woman was high maintenance. He also admitted that low self-esteem played a major role in his decision to live beyond his means.
Stories like this reveal something uncomfortable about men.
Many of us spend the most money on the women we feel we do not deserve.
As a man, I can relate. When you highly value a woman, the temptation to impress her becomes very real.
The interesting part is that it is rarely about her. More often than not, it is about you. You want to feel manlier by acquiring what you think most men your level cannot get.
The danger is that once you start spending to prove your worth, there is no finish line.
There will always be a more expensive restaurant.
A more expensive gift.
A more expensive woman.
The only way to win is to stop competing and if you must compete, don’t compete with societal pressure, social media or workmates, compete with your yesterday, compete to make your tomorrow better.
Live within your means. Build your finances. Date people whose lifestyles your income can comfortably support.
The truth is financial freedom is more attractive than a lifestyle that has been financed by debt.
